Friday, July 24, 2026
I had originally planned for my next post to be titled something like “Sicko Mode: A Knicks Summer League Game Diary,” but, alas, I seem to not be quite as much of a sicko as I thought, as I wasn’t able to bring myself to watch even a second of Summer League. And, as an NBA Champion1, I think that’s my god given right.
However, to satisfy the deep, dark parts of my psyche that seem to wish I was still rooting for a team clutched in the talons of a perpetual tank, I thought I’d take a look at some of the NBA teams that are projected to finish at the bottom of the standings this coming year, with a special eye at how the new so-called ‘Relegation Zone’ (more on that moniker later) might affect their lot this season.
From our enemies at B*ettingpros, the bottom ten teams by projected 2026-27 win total are:
10) Charlotte – 40.5 ·
9) Washington – 39.5 ·
8) Utah – 36.5
T7) New Orleans – 26.5
T7) LA Clippers – 26.5
5) Chicago – 24.5 ·
4) Milwaukee – 22.5
3) Memphis – 21.5 ·
2) Sacramento – 20.5 ·
1) Brooklyn – 15.5
Each team marked with a · has control of their own draft pick in the 2027 NBA draft (as far as I can tell? Don’t shoot me if I’m wrong about anything). That will be the lens through which we examine each team’s motivations and desired outcomes for the next season, especially in the ways that it differs from what we would have expected under the lottery rules of yesteryear.
We’ll go over various elements of the new lottery system as we get into the nitty-gritty of each team, but, as a general rule, a team’s best chance at drawing that coveted Zacharie-Rissacher-shaped lottery ball is to miss the play-in but NOT have one of the three worst records in the league. Bottom-three means puts you in the ‘Relegation Zone’, which is usually Bad.
And, speaking of Bad, we of course must start with the Brooklyn Nets. With an over-under of 15.5, the second-class denizens of the Barclays Center are projected to be far and away the worst team in the league next year. HOWEVER, despite what I just said three sentences ago, I don’t think the Nets would actually mind being in the ‘Relegation Zone.’ Contrary to the dire-sounding name, the worst teams in the NBA aren’t booted down into the G League, or even out to Adam Silver’s new NBA Old World. They simply have a lesser chance of their name being drawn across each of the first 12 picks of the draft,2 and, since the Nets owe a first round pick swap to the Rockets in the final dividends of the James Harden trade (v2 of 5), they wouldn’t mind avoiding another Jayson Tatum situation and having that pick fall as high as possible.3 Furthermore, the new lottery rules also are meant to disincentivize being bad for multiple years in a row, and, therefore, teams will not be allowed to have the first overall pick in two straight years or a top-five pick in three straight years. Crucially, these restrictions “will apply only to each team’s own pick without regard to whether that pick has been retained by the team or traded to (and thus held by) another team.”4 So, if the Nets were to end up handing the number one pick to the Rockets in 2027, that would make their own pick ineligible to fall first in 2028, when they do have full control of it (and the likewise situation if the 2027 pick is in the top five).
All that being said, it’s time to Tank, Baby Tank for the Brooklyn Nets! I remain a Julius Randle fan, and am eternally grateful to him and Tom Thibadeau for adding winning as an option for my favorite franchise, but I think that a Big Two of Randle and Michael Porter Jr. just cannot be capable of producing much winning basketball. Thankfully for the Nets, winning is a choice, and, despite the NBA’s best efforts, Brooklyn has every incentive to Just Say No in the 2026-27 season.
Oh, the Sacramento Kings. Everyone needs a punching bag team, whether it’s the NBA or your fantasy league, and Vivek Ranadivé continues to be the Bob for every basketball pundit the world over. They finally managed a halfway decent tank last year, finishing with the fifth worst record in the league amongst stacked competition, but fell two slots in the draft to pick seventh in a four-man draft. Based purely on vibes and his stupid draft day shades, I don’t predict Darius Acuff to be a franchise-altering player, and he’s especially unlikely to light up the league this year as a rookie point guard. Thus, the following questions: can a 30-year-old Domas Sabonis recover cleanly from a torn meniscus? Will Zach Lavine bring his losing brand of basketball back to the All-Star Game for the first time since 2022? Or will they just say fuck it and trade them all, despite tanking no longer beinga viable path to a top pick? I’d wager that, whatever they chose to do, this team will end up being a bottom three seed and falling into the ‘Relegation Zone,’ continuing their haplessness, then end up firing Doug Christie and replacing him with some other early 2000s King. What’s Lawrence Funderburke up to these days?
And now, as promised, a brief intermission to discuss the name of this ‘Relegation Zone.’ Disgusting. Horrendous. Irresponsible. Have Adam Silver and his cronies really stooped so low as to cater to the EuroFetishists and their obsession with turning the NBA into La Liga? Or is it all just ploy to make those downtrodden Real Oviedo fans switch over and pledge their allegiance to the Orlando Magic after watching their team actually get relegated?5 Either way, abhorrent, childish behavior.
The Grizzlies! Memphis has finally fully excised itself of the “Fine in the West” roster that managed to win a singular playoff series in five seasons,6 with the trades of Ja Morant and Jaren Jackson Jr. completing the dismantling that began with not choosing to re-sign Dillon Brooks “under any circumstances.” And the bald-headed alien gods have smiled favorably on the team, gifting them a beacon of hope in the form of Cameron Boozer. Boozer, Cedric Coward, and Zach Edey have the makings of a legitimate young core, and, alongside nobody’s favorite player Jerami Grant,7 this team will clearly benefit from the new lottery rules and the re-incentivization of winning. I expect high League Pass Rankings for the Grizzlies this year.
The same, unfortunately, cannot be said for the Milwaukee Bucks. Another team without its own pick, the Bucks should, and I think will, do their best effort to end up in the ‘Relegation Zone.’ Milwaukee’s native son Tyler Herro should be an adept tank commander, as long as newly-based Kyle Kuzma doesn’t fill his head with nonsense by talking about the Crusades or some shit like that. I think it would be a positive for the league overall if Myles Turner were able to rehab his trade value and be an interesting piece at the deadline; his contract really isn’t that onerous, at about $27M this year and next and then a player option for 2028-29, and a playoff team lacking size could definitely come knocking at Milwaukee’s door with an offer. Overall, bad basketball.
Rounding out our top five is the Chicago Bulls, whom I wrote positively about in my last post. In doing some research for this, I was really surprised to find that the Bulls have a completely clean sheet of first round picks, with all of their own picks and none from any other teams. Like the Grizzlies, this is another team that should greatly benefit from the new system – not necessarily in that they will definitely get another top pick to pair with Caleb Wilson, but in the sense that this is a mediocre team that will just be incentivized to win as many games as possible. They probably won’t make the playoffs in a kinda stacked Eastern Conference, but that’s fine! Get everyone their reps, let them get older and wiser and stronger and come back next year with an eye for the 6 seed.
Aaaaaand that’s as many teams as I care to really write about! The Clippers, Pelicans, and Jazz all don’t have control of their own picks but are probably too talented to drop into ‘Relegation’ without extreme shenanigans (and the Pelicans aren’t nearly competent enough to pull off any shenanigans). Washington and Charlotte should both be pushing for the play-in but wouldn’t be devasted if they didn’t make it and had a better chance at a top pick.
I hope my main point was clear enough here – in general, I think the new lottery rules do a good job of incentivizing winning for mediocre teams, but the NBA may have missed the mark with how they implemented limiting teams from having high picks in successive drafts. I’m also not sure about being so punitive to the worst teams in the league; it feels like a reaction to teams’ bad behavior under the previous ruleset, as opposed to a system that honors the American tradition of worst-to-best drafts (aka, welfare) and furthers Adam Silver’s wet dream of every team having a .500 record. The ‘Relegation Zone’ could easily put bad teams in a Sisyphean purgatory, with fans unable to rely on hope and luck and prayers to the lottery gods for a glimmer of hope in the darkest of Emmanual Mudiay-filled times.
1Personally
2The top 16 picks are all drawn by lottery (unlike the previous system, which really just randomized the top 4 and slotted everyone else in by record), but teams in the ‘Relegation Zone’ cannot pick lower than 12.
3I know what you’re thinking, and yes, technically the Rockets could also be really bad and then that swap could still net the Nets a good pick. But my guy KD could never let that happen, right?????
4Mouthful courtesy of NBA.com.
5I’d be ashamed if I didn’t have to look this up.
6That lone victory came in 2022, where they beat the Timberwolves team of Pat-Bev-jumping-on-the-scorer’s-table-after-winning-a-play-in-game fame.
7Do you think anyone has a Jerami Grant jersey?
ezra gans 
